Writings

Fall. In. Love. Again. and. Again


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I fell in love three days ago when we sat in the bed of a friend, surrounded by friends, and we made jokes that no one else gets
This morning you walked into the bathroom as a bearded man
When you came out you had shed your beard
I on the other hand, shed nothing
I only layered up with love,
I fell,
for you
again

I’ve known that love, that overused word, becomes stronger over time
I feel it for friends every time I meet them
I fall in love with them
It’s the self-explanatory kind of love,
the one that tells me that whatever evil you, my friend, might do to me,
I’ll always love you

With you on the other hand
When I fall, over
and
over
stronger
and stronger

It’s not with certainty
It comes in shockwaves
As if you baffle me with your sheer existence,
and you’re standing there, open to my loving you
Who am I then to not be completely absorbed
To not take my chance on falling
in
love
again
When it’s the greatest experience of them all

The difference is that whatever evil you might do to me
I won’t always love you
I won’t forgive

Perhaps that’s the reason to why I let myself lean in into what is us
Because I know that it’s not for certain
So I take my chances with braveity
For it’s the only way I will know
that whatever pain might come my way because of you
at least I loved whole-heartedly, with every piece of me
and when one has done that
there are no regrets
no wrong-doings
nothing that could have been done differently

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